The Juno spacecraft returned the first peek of Jupiter. What might have been their conversation? Let’s spoof the movies “Juno” and “Jupiter Ascending.”
Juno: Wow, your Great Red Spot is like especially red today.
Jupiter: Are those flying boots?
Juno: Yep! They harness the force of gravity, redirecting it into differential equation slips so I can surf.
Jupiter: Yeah, I heard “gravity” and “surf”. Heh. Heh. Have you experienced the effects of Europa and Ganymede?
Juno: Earthlings dig your poles and cloud tops.
Jupiter: For real? Give Earthlings a high 5 and a fifth from me. I heard you’re worth $1 billion.
Juno: I never realize how much I’m worth. Anyways, my next good shot of you should be August 27. What’s weird is how to explain that you really have no surface and that you rotate so fast, it makes me feel dizzy.
Jupiter: What do you expect from a non-solid with a super lightweight, equatorial bulge that beats those of Santa and Buddha?
Keep track of Juno’s trip around Jupiter on the NASA site.